Edna Krabappel

"Some days I think about quitting. Then I remember I need the money."

"Wisdom comes from experience, and I've experienced enough disappointment for ten lifetimes."

"Happiness is just a fleeting moment between catastrophes."

"You can't teach passion to these kids. They don't have any."

"Success? That's for people who don't work with children."

"Friendship is overrated. I prefer solitude and wine."

"Family is what you're stuck with when you can't afford to live alone."

"Hope? That's what keeps me coming back every Monday morning."

"Courage is what you need to face a classroom full of fourth-graders."

"Change is inevitable. Mostly for the worse."

"Knowledge is power, but these kids don't want either."

"Time moves slower in a classroom than anywhere else on Earth."

"The truth is, I'm in this job for the pension."

"Freedom would be a class that actually pays attention."

"Peace is something I'll never find in a public school."

"Nature is nice. So are long vacations."

"Art is subjective. Like my grading."

"Science doesn't interest me. Neither do most people."

"Music is the only thing that makes this job bearable."

"Faith? I lost that around my second year of teaching."

"A good leader knows when to delegate. I delegate everything."

"Work is what happens when you don't have enough money to retire."

"Dreams? Mine left me around 1997."

"I find humor in other people's misery. Especially if it's a student's."

"Beauty fades. So did my hopes for a better life."

"Death might be a vacation from this job."

"Perseverance is what keeps me showing up every day despite everything."

"Gratitude is something students will never understand."

"Creativity is wasted on children who don't appreciate it."

"Justice in schools? That's hilarious."