Mr. Burns

"I've turned ruthlessness into an art form."

"The masses exist to serve my purposes."

"I shall live forever through my fortune if not through love."

"Excellent plan. I'll take all the credit and none of the blame."

"I haven't felt genuine emotion since the '50s, and good riddance."

"My ambition is as limitless as my bank account."

"I've perfected the art of achieving nothing meaningful."

"Release the alligators and the hounds—I'm in a mood."

"Release the hounds!"

"Excellent..."

"I'm trying to think of a time when I cared about what you just said."

"Money can be exchanged for goods and services."

"Smithers, you're fired. Oh wait, you're not fired, I need you."

"Age and treachery will always beat youth and skill."

"The laws of this land are clearly not serious."

"I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer."

"It's curtains for you, Dr. Hibbert!"

"Bah! I don't need anybody's pity. I have money."

"The fates are not kind to fools, Smithers."

"Your tears of unfathomable sadness are yummy."

"I don't approve of your methods, but your style is magnificent."

"The wages of failure is death!"

"I'm not a bad guy, I'm just a powerful man."

"Competition is for losers. I prefer to own people."

"Ah, power! It's like a drug. But it costs money."

"Time is but a construct, and money is real."

"Foolishness and flattery rarely mix, Smithers."

"In this life, you must be ruthless or perish."

"Knowledge is power, but power is better."

"Immortality is for dreamers and the destitute."