Stewie Griffin

"Technology is wonderful when you're the one controlling it."

"History will remember me as a genius, or dead. Hopefully not dead."

"Philosophy is just thinking really hard about stuff I already know."

"Motivation? I am my own motivation. Also, revenge."

"The only inspiration I need is my burning desire for domination."

"Relationships require trust. I don't do trust."

"Solitude is where I do my best work. Stay away from me."

"Victory! Mine enemies have been vanquished. Now I can finally focus on world domination."

"Ah yes, another day of pretending to be an infant while secretly plotting my rise to glory."

"You know what? I don't need friends. I need minions. There's a difference."

"Death? Please. I've been planning my own demise for years. It'll be far more impressive."

"Family is just a bunch of people you're stuck with. Make the best of it by manipulating them."

"Love is for suckers and people with low IQs. I prefer world conquest."

"Patience is a virtue for people without the guts to act immediately."

"Knowledge is power, and I intend to have all of it. Then the world will tremble."

"Success isn't about being nice. It's about being ruthless and stupidly handsome."

"The greatest trick I ever pulled was convincing everyone I was just a baby."

"Courage is easy when you're a genius like myself. Fear is for the common man."

"Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy an army. And that's close enough."

"Time is a construct I'll eventually master and bend to my will."

"Hope? That's what losers cling to. I prefer concrete plans and evil schemes."

"Leadership means making everyone else do what you want without them realizing it."

"Art is merely a stepping stone on my path to absolute authority."

"Technology will be my greatest ally in achieving world domination."

"Dreams? I don't dream. I execute. There's a difference."

"Peace is boring. War, now that's entertainment."

"Nature is beautiful only when it serves my purposes."

"Music is a weapon. I'm still deciding how to use it."

"Education is important. Knowledge is what separates me from you peasants."

"Philosophy is just what people use to justify their failures."