30 Rock

"Friendship is about being there for someone when it matters most."

"Never go with your gut. Guts are stupid."

"I want to go to there."

"The key to success is to surround yourself with people smarter than you."

"Money can't buy you happiness, but it can buy you a jet ski. Have you ever seen a sad person on a jet ski?"

"Life is a gift. Don't waste it on things that don't matter."

"I'm Tracy Jordan. You might know me from such films as 'African American History Month' and 'Honky Grandma Be Tripendicular.'"

"Solitude is just loneliness that sounds more intentional."

"Relationships are just two people being weird together until they're not."

"Inspiration is what you call procrastination when it works out."

"Motivation is temporary, strategy is permanent, laziness is eternal."

"Politics is conflict that pretends to be productive."

"Literature is someone else's diary that you have to read for school."

"Philosophy is thinking about thinking, which is its own problem."

"History is just old news that nobody learned from."

"Technology was supposed to make life easier, plot twist: it didn't."

"Imagination is the only escape from reality that's free."

"Adventure is travel when you don't know what you're doing."

"Power is having people do things because they think you matter."

"Fear is just your body being honest about the situation."

"Strength is pretending you're okay when you're not."

"Kindness is hard when most people are terrible."

"Patience is what old people call laziness."

"Justice is whatever the loudest person believes."

"Creativity is breaking rules you didn't know existed."

"Gratitude is nice but thankfulness is exhausting."

"Perseverance is just refusing to accept reality."

"Death is the only appointment you can't reschedule."

"Beauty is whatever you find beautiful, unless it's weird then we'll judge you."

"Humor is just pain repackaged as funny stories."