Family Guy

"I've learned that life is too short to hold grudges."

"Happiness is a state of mind, but it helps if you have snacks."

"Love is patient, love is kind, love is also really annoying sometimes."

"Family is the people who have to love you no matter what."

"Education is important, but common sense is more important."

"Change is inevitable, but that doesn't mean I have to like it."

"Courage is being scared but doing it anyway, usually with a friend."

"I believe that everyone deserves a second chance, even if they mess up the first one."

"Failure is just success that hasn't been labeled correctly."

"Success is when your friends are jealous and your enemies are angry."

"I've never been good at planning, so I just wing it."

"The best things in life are free, but they cost a lot in time."

"I try not to think too much about the future; it's usually disappointing."

"Solitude is nice when it's your choice, not when it's forced on you."

"Relationships are like beer; they're better when they're cold and bitter."

"Inspiration strikes when you least expect it, usually when you're eating."

"Motivation is just fear with better marketing."

"War is what happens when people forget how to talk."

"Politics is a dirty game, and someone's gotta get their hands dirty."

"The only thing I know about literature is that it has letters in it."

"Philosophy is trying to understand something you don't understand."

"History is just a bunch of stories about dead people."

"Technology is making us lazier, and I'm totally okay with that."

"Imagination is more important than intelligence, especially when you're stupid."

"Adventure is just a problem you haven't solved yet."

"Health is wealth, but beer is happiness."

"Power corrupts, but absolute power is pretty awesome."

"I've learned that admitting you're wrong is harder than being wrong."

"Strength isn't about how much you can lift; it's about how much you can take."

"Kindness is free, but it's worth its weight in gold."