Family Guy

"Hard work pays off, but evil genius pays better."

"A good leader inspires fear and respect. I go for both."

"Faith in myself has never failed me. Mostly."

"The most beautiful sound? My maniacal laughter."

"Science without evil intent is just a hobby."

"Art is just expression. I prefer expression through destruction."

"I'm grateful for my genius. That's about it."

"Every setback is just a setup for a bigger comeback."

"True happiness is watching your enemies fail."

"The best thing about friendship is using them for your plans."

"Success smells like my own excellence."

"My family is idiots, but they're MY idiots to manipulate."

"Love is for people who aren't busy conquering worlds."

"Sometimes I wonder if there's more to life than scheming. Then I remember: no."

"I came, I saw, I conquered. In my mind, anyway."

"Revenge is a dish best served with a side of world domination."

"Truth is whatever serves my purposes best."

"Time moves faster when you're having fun destroying things."

"Education is important, though most of mine was self-taught villainy."

"Change is inevitable, especially when I'm the one causing it."

"Courage is attempting something insane. Which I do daily."

"Wisdom is knowing when to laugh maniacally."

"Imagination is where my greatest plans are born."

"Adventure is searching for the perfect doomsday device."

"Health is important for evil geniuses. Dead villains can't conquer."

"Money is just a means to an end. That end being world conquest."

"Fear is my best tool. Mostly others' fear."

"Kindness is weakness. Cruelty is clarity."

"Patience? I've got all the time in the world to take over."

"Solitude is perfect for scheming."