Parks and Recreation

"I hate it here and everyone here."

"Life is meaningless but at least I have you."

"I'm going to be alone forever and that's okay."

"You're the only thing that makes sense."

"This is why I don't talk to people."

"Stop making me have emotions."

"I'm slowly dying inside, which is fine."

"You ruin everything by being good."

"I accept that I'm a terrible person."

"Why does anyone do anything?"

"I'm allergic to people."

"You're the only person worth my time."

"I'm going to embrace my darkness."

"Go away, I hate you."

"I've never cared about anything in my entire life."

"Everything is pointless."

"You make me want to be a better person, which is annoying."

"I don't want to hang out ever."

"This is a disaster and I'm responsible."

"You complete me, which is disgusting."

"I have contempt for all living things."

"Being with you is the worst and best thing."

"I'm a walking black cloud."

"You're lucky I tolerate you."

"I'm incredibly mean because it's easier than being nice."

"There's no point to anything."

"I hate feelings. They make me feel bad."

"You made me want to live."

"This is the most horrifying thing I've ever heard."

"I'm going to enjoy this feeling for exactly fifteen seconds."