Nelson Muntz

"Inspiration comes from my own awesomeness."

"Relationships? Only if they benefit me."

"Solitude? Only if I'm plotting something."

"You're such a dork that even dorked-out dorking is dorky."

"My fists are trained weapons of superiority."

"Friends are just allies in my quest to be better."

"Family taught me that might makes right."

"Every insult I give makes me smarter."

"Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing."

"Why listen when you can just punch?"

"The strong deserve to rule the weak."

"Bullying is just being honest with everyone."

"My jacket is cooler than your entire wardrobe."

"School is where I teach real lessons."

"Laughter at others is the best medicine."

"I don't follow rules, rules follow me."

"Money can't buy happiness, but it buys respect."

"Life's too short to be nice to nerds."

"My future is guaranteed to be victorious."

"Love for myself is all I need."

"Hard work is for people who aren't naturally gifted."

"Every day I wake up, the weak get weaker."

"Truth hurts, especially when I'm telling it."

"Peace is just the time between my victories."

"I don't need hope, I have certainty."

"Courage is knowing I can beat anyone."

"Change? I'm already perfect."

"Technology makes my tormenting more efficient."

"Adventure is hunting for my next victim."

"My imagination is thinking of new insults."