Parks and Recreation

"Breakfast foods can serve many purposes throughout the day."

"When I die, I want my remains scattered in the Pawnee Commons."

"I'm not the kind of girl who goes to the woods to find herself."

"Why would you want to talk to anybody? People are the worst."

"I want to make things and do stuff."

"Everything is the worst and I'm not going to pretend otherwise."

"I'm not interested in caring about things."

"Treat yo'self. That's the motto for success."

"I have no idea what I'm doing, but I look expensive and that's what matters."

"Flirtation is a sign of weakness. Be direct and honest."

"I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious."

"I believe in small government and large whiskeys."

"Every person should learn a trade. It builds character."

"I would die for my family, but I'd never admit it to their faces."

"The free market will solve all problems, if given the chance."

"I have opinions about everything and I'm always right."

"Change is inevitable, but I won't like it."

"I respect the Constitution more than I respect most people."

"Everything the government does is wrong and inefficient."

"I would rather spend a night alone with a good book than at a party."

"April and I have a strong marriage because we don't talk too much."

"I'm building something in the woodshop. It's going to be beautiful."

"I believe in the death penalty. I believe in a lot of things."

"Government bloat is the enemy of prosperity."

"I respect anyone who has a strong work ethic and a good handshake."

"Work hard, play hard, and never stop improving yourself."

"I've never used a computer and I don't intend to start now."

"Music should be loud, proud, and played on a 12-string guitar."

"I don't believe in social media. I believe in face-to-face communication."

"I have a cabin in the woods. It has no electricity, no running water, and no people."