Arrested Development

"Dreams are where all your worst fears come to visit."

"Work is the thing you do to avoid thinking about your life."

"Leadership is just manipulation with better intentions."

"Faith is easy when everything's going your way."

"Music makes everything seem more important than it probably is."

"Science proves that most of what we believe is wrong."

"Art is whatever you can convince someone else to value."

"Nature is beautiful when you don't have to actually interact with it."

"Peace is just the absence of people who bother you."

"The only freedom that matters is the freedom from responsibility."

"Courage is just fear that hasn't backed down yet."

"Hope is what keeps you from killing yourself."

"Life is like a high school play—everyone's pretending to know their lines."

"True friendship means keeping secrets, even really damaging ones."

"Success is 10% inspiration and 90% convincing people you know what you're doing."

"I've reinvented myself so many times, I forget who I started as."

"Happiness is temporary, but regret lasts forever."

"Never underestimate the power of a well-timed lie."

"Family dysfunction is the foundation of all great comedy."

"Love is just a game where both players cheat."

"Getting older doesn't mean getting wiser, just more tired."

"The secret to success is looking like you know what you're talking about."

"I'm basically a chameleon. I blend in wherever I go."

"Lies are like investments—the more you put in, the harder it is to get out."

"Solitude is underrated when you have people who annoy you constantly."

"Relationships are just two people agreeing to tolerate each other."

"Inspiration usually comes right before catastrophe."

"Motivation is just desperation wearing a nice suit."

"War is what happens when diplomacy fails and patience runs out."

"Politics is the art of deciding who gets to lie the most convincingly."