Futurama

"I've got a robot's body, but a human's heart. Well, not really."

"Being self-employed is the only way to be truly free."

"Kill all humans! ...Just kidding, I like you."

"I'm more human than I look."

"What's the point of a future if I can't get drunk in it?"

"Bend, hell! I wanna kill!"

"I'm gonna make bank!"

"I'm back on the wagon... just kidding, that was a lie."

"Robots don't have emotions. So I won't cry when you die."

"I hate the suburbs!"

"Why not Zoidberg?"

"It doesn't matter what I think. All that matters is what I'm gonna do about it."

"I'm gonna make my own luck!"

"Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV, sitting down with your loved ones, and hitting them?"

"I'm not a robot, I'm a BENDING UNIT!"

"Nobody beats Bender!"

"I'm gonna steal so much stuff!"

"The key to a great friendship is low expectations and zero trust."

"I love this job more than I love my own life."

"I'm not insane, I'm just less sane than you are."

"What good is friendship if you can't profit from it?"

"I'd like to order a large alcohol."

"Your tears of unfathomable sadness are delicious to me."

"I don't want to be a sentimental piece of garbage!"

"Being a robot is the best thing that ever happened to me."

"Dear robot Santa, I've been very good this year."

"I'm gonna drink and get crazy!"

"Nothing says 'I love you' like blackmail."

"If I had a dime for every time I died, I'd be rich!"

"I'm a bending unit. I bend stuff. That's what I do. That's who I am."