The Simpsons

"I've never questioned Mr. Burns' decisions, and I've never regretted it."

"Inspiration is found in the success of those we serve."

"Motivation comes from those who hold your future in their hands."

"Political change affects employment, but employment defines identity."

"Literature teaches us that great stories involve great devoted followers."

"Philosophy asks why we exist; employment provides the answer."

"Historical figures pale in comparison to the great men of industry."

"Technology is a tool for increasing productivity and surveillance."

"Imagination should be channeled into solving workplace problems."

"Adventure is discovering new ways to please your employer."

"Health is important, but health insurance through your employer is more important."

"Money cannot buy happiness, but a good salary buys complicity."

"Power is best served through the person wielding it over you."

"Fear of failure drives excellence in those who depend on approval."

"Strength is measured by one's ability to endure repeated disappointment."

"Patience is rewarded with slightly less disdain from above."

"Justice is knowing one's place in the corporate hierarchy."

"The creative process is best guided by the demands of management."

"Gratitude should be expressed through increased work output."

"Persevere through any hardship if it means staying employed."

"Mortality reminds us to make the most of our working years."

"The most beautiful thing in life is a perfectly executed professional duty."

"Humor is best when directed at those who cannot fire you."

"Every dream can come true if you devote every waking moment to someone else's vision."

"Work-life balance is a myth; work should be your life."

"A leader's greatest asset is a subordinate who asks no questions."

"Faith without works is dead, but loyalty without doubt is divine."

"The sweetest music is the sound of one's achievements being acknowledged."

"Science has proven that productivity increases with proper motivation through fear."

"True art is the art of making oneself indispensable to one's employer."