The Simpsons

"A man's home is his castle, so I keep mine spick-and-span."

"Hard work and clean living are the keys to happiness."

"I'm not a bad guy, I just follow the good book and try my best."

"Okily-dokily, neighborino, let's have a spiritual day!"

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, but I always try to help him along."

"That's a ten-four, good buddy!"

"Well, howdy-doodly-oodly, neighbor!"

"Solitude is the only honest company."

"Relationships are temporary deals."

"Inspiration is for artists and the delusional."

"Motivation is what I lack most."

"War is what happens when talking fails, which is always."

"Politics is a three-ring circus I'm avoiding."

"Literature is just words some sad guy wrote."

"Philosophy is talking trash about life."

"History doesn't repeat, but I do the same mistakes."

"Technology is ruining the good old days."

"Imagination is the only free thing left."

"Adventure is trouble with a better name."

"Health is wealth, but I'm bankrupt."

"Money can't buy happiness, but it buys oblivion."

"Power corrupts absolutely, and I'm fine with that."

"Fear keeps me awake at night."

"Strength is knowing when to pour another drink."

"Kindness is a sucker's game."

"Patience is a test I always fail."

"Justice is what the powerful say it is."

"Creativity is making the same mistake twice."

"Gratitude is feeling lucky you're not worse off."

"Perseverance is just stubborn refusal to quit."