The Simpsons

"I've sold my soul, but I can always buy it back."

"Laughter is the best medicine."

"Your love is like a drug."

"The beauty of jazz is that you can make mistakes on purpose and it's okay."

"I just wanted to impress you with my intelligence and my saxophone playing."

"Being smart is hard."

"I have to find a new dream because that one's getting pretty old."

"Nothing says family like watching TV together."

"Sacrilicious!"

"I learned that you can't live in the past."

"Potential is a terrible curse."

"All lies and jests, still a man hears what he wants to hear."

"We're just a bunch of selfish, materialism-driven animals."

"Sometimes the only way to cope with loss is to embrace the unknown."

"Life is like a box of donuts, you never know what you're gonna get."

"I can't believe I'm an underachiever. I've worked so hard to be one."

"The saddest thing about friendship is that years after it ends, you'll still catch yourself doing little things they taught you."

"I believe that children are the future, unless we stop them now."

"My slingshot has taught me that violence is never the answer."

"Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world."

"I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, save me Superman!"

"Sometimes you need solitude to figure out how to make more money!"

"Relationships work best when both parties understand the financial terms!"

"Inspiration is knowing there's always another audience to entertain!"

"Stay motivated and keep grinding - the money will come!"

"Politics and show business - same game, different costumes!"

"The only literature worth reading has a dollar sign on it!"

"Philosophy? That's just thinking about why you're not rich enough!"

"History repeats itself, which means I can use the same jokes again!"

"Technology is great if it makes you richer!"