The Simpsons

"The only philosophy that matters is survival."

"History shows us that violence never goes out of style."

"Technology makes hurting each other easier every day."

"Your imagination is the only limit to chaos you can create."

"Adventure awaits those brave enough to leave the house."

"Health is wealth when you're still breathing."

"Money isn't everything, but a sharp knife is."

"Power is the ability to make others fear you."

"Fear is the most honest emotion."

"A strong will can overcome any obstacle, or circumvent it violently."

"Kill them with kindness, or just kill them."

"Good things come to those who wait—then pounce."

"Justice is served best when it's cold and delivered with violence."

"Creative destruction is the best kind of creativity."

"Be grateful for the moments when nobody's hitting you."

"Never give up, even when flattened by a steamroller."

"Death is just another Tuesday for me."

"Beauty lies in the eye of the beholder—right before you poke it."

"Humor is the best medicine, especially when delivered via blunt force."

"Dream of chases so perfect, you never want to wake up."

"Work hard and your reward is more opportunities to suffer."

"Leadership means showing the way—usually with a sword."

"Faith that you'll escape is the only faith that matters."

"Music and violence—the perfect duet."

"Science has no limits when applied to hurting mice."

"Art imitates life—especially the painful parts."

"Nature's cruel, and so am I."

"Peace is what happens after you've exhausted all violent options."

"Freedom is the liberty to pursue your victim at full speed."

"Truth is the first casualty of a well-executed punchline."